Keeping Up With...

Carolyn Keep

Hello Officer...

Today I found myself dealing with the Police - and not in a “talk myself out of a ticket by fluttering my eyelashes kind of way” but the – “Are you aware you have a warrant out for your arrest kind of way” – I mean, I wouldn’t call myself a Bad Ass, in fact, I would like to think I’m a law abiding citizen…turns out, not so much. In the words of Michael Jackson, yip, “I’m bad”…

Flash back to 4 and a half years ago when I was a young, impressionable little lady in my late 20’s taking on the big wide world, moving away from home to “find myself” in a gigantic city that had the entire population of New Zealand living in it, and who had no idea that parking fines in New Zealand were actually bloody cheap…

Fast forward back to this morning when I was on my way to work, singing to my stereo at the top of my lungs (I’m learning a duet currently…serious business) and planning to have a successful day taking over the world (or at least getting some good deals across the line, and a couple of successful meetings under my belt) and I hear the sound of sirens…I pull over so the Cops can go past and catch the criminal they were after (I’m very polite like that) and they pulled up behind ME…”What the?!” I thought to myself…cue sweet smile and chit chat tone - “Hello Officer” I say politely, not even a little bit of “flirt” could help me with this one…I was then told (once my licence had been snatched from me, my record checked, and my happiness at the potential of a new day ahead of me smashed to smithereens) that I owed a sh**load of money (and by that I mean a SH**LOAD) on unpaid fines, and because I had missed one payment on a payment plan I had set up, I could be arrested!?!?! I mean seriously…

The only way to get back on a payment plan was to…and here is the part that made me want to punch myself in the head…pay back $2,100 TODAY so I was back on the good side of the law. There goes my first TWO months of saving for my travels; there goes my fashionistafail dreams being sucked into the Melbourne roads and not on a ticket overseas…(I’m also staring down the barrel of eating 2 minute noodles all month) and I found myself thinking…why on earth did I not pay the fines as soon as I got the damn things? Um…why? Well, because (no doubt) I said to myself at the time that I’d pay them next month and this month I’ll buy shoes…The next month obviously came and went, and I did the same thing…over and over again. Idiot.

It was a real eye opener to the decision making process I have been using for the last few years…which clearly, wasn’t a workable one!? Paying that amount today has not only cost me the price of a round the world trip, it has cost me more…it has cost me “like myself points” – because as of right now, I really don’t like myself much at all. I’m angry at myself, and the thing is, could I tell you what it was that I bought instead of just paying those fines as they came up? No. Chances are I have given the shoes/clothes whatever it was to friends anyway…

I was found out. I was caught in my stupid decisions. My procrastinating, pretending they weren’t there to be paid, that they didn’t exist…I am utterly ashamed of not dealing with the things as they came up…a $70 ticket now costs me $300…mathematics isn’t my strong point, but I’m guessing that that’s not good “money management”…

I will sleep today off…I will wake up tomorrow and start again. The one take out from this whole experience is that it became VERY clear to me that my fashionistafail journey is a much needed one. It’s about time I took responsibility for my monetary decisions and grew the F up…I can love, adore and worship clothes, but like any relationship, if it’s not bringing out the best in me…then maybe (love aside) it needs to be given up. The relationship should take a break perhaps, and the individuals involved given the space to see if they can (or can’t) live in a world where the other doesn’t exist. That is me and clothes right now…we are on a break…and I don’t mind if they cheat on me while we are apart…I mean good clothes need bodies to rest themselves on…I get it. And I will accept my part in our semi-permanent break up.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go to bed and cry into my pillow…

Caro x

Posted: Tuesday 15 July 2014


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